These were collected by real journalists in America...
- Something went wrong in jet crash, says expert

- Drunk gets nine months in violin case

- Iraqi head seeks arms

- Prostitutes appeal to pope

- Eye drops off shelf

- Reagan wins on budget, but more lies ahead

- Enraged cow injures farmer with axe

- Miners refuse to work after death

- Two sisters reunited after 18 years in checkout counter

- Astronaut takes blams for gas in spacecraft

- Never withhold herpes infection from loved one

- War dims hope for peace

- Cold wave linked to temperatures

- Deer kill 17000

- British union finds dwarves in short supply

- Kids make nutritious snacks

- Local high school dropouts cut in half

- Air Head fired

- Typhoon rips through cemetery; hundreds dead